Joy Wasted with KB Dickey

Let’s talk about boundaries. You know, those invisible lines that protect your peace, time, and energy. The ones you set when you’ve finally decided, “Nope, I’m not living like this anymore.” Yeah, those. Now, here’s the kicker: the moment you start enforcing boundaries, the same folks who had a front-row seat to your generosity (or let’s be real—your overextending) suddenly aren’t clapping anymore. Why? Because they benefited from you not having boundaries in the first place.

---

What Happens When You Set Boundaries?

When you draw the line, two things happen:

1. You get your life back.
2. They lose access to the version of you that put their needs above your own.

And guess what? Some people are big mad about that. They’ve grown accustomed to you always saying “yes,” bending over backward, and being the reliable fixer for their chaos. They didn’t see it as a problem—because it wasn’t their problem. It worked for them.

But now, you’re flipping the script. You’re saying “no” when it doesn’t serve you, protecting your energy, and prioritizing your own needs. And the ones who thrived off your lack of boundaries? They’re feeling the heat.

---

The Reality Check They Don’t Want to Hear

Here’s the truth: if someone gets upset because you’re no longer over-giving, they were never truly in your corner. They were in the corner of convenience. They liked how your lack of boundaries made their life easier.

But that’s not your responsibility anymore.

Healthy relationships thrive on mutual respect, not one-sided sacrifice. The people who truly care about you will respect your boundaries—even if it inconveniences them.

---

Why Setting Boundaries Feels Hard

Let’s be real—setting boundaries isn’t all rainbows and instant peace. It’s uncomfortable. You might feel guilty. They might guilt-trip you, lash out, or pull the classic “you’ve changed” card. And you know what? They’re right. You have changed—for the better.

It’s hard because, for so long, you might have measured your worth by how much you did for others. You became the go-to person, the fixer, the “always-available” friend or family member. But here’s the thing: constantly pouring out without refilling your own cup leads to burnout, resentment, and even bitterness. Boundaries are how you stop the cycle.

---

Let Them Adjust—or Let Them Go

Not everyone will celebrate your growth, and that’s okay. Some people will adjust to the new you, respecting your limits and valuing the relationship beyond what they can get out of it. Others? They’ll fall off—and that’s okay too.

Your boundaries are not a betrayal; they’re an act of self-love. The people meant to be in your life will respect that. The rest were likely just along for the ride.

---

Protecting Your Peace Is Non-Negotiable

Remember, setting boundaries isn’t about being selfish—it’s about self-preservation. You can’t show up for others if you’re constantly drained and depleted. Protecting your peace is non-negotiable, and anyone who has a problem with that doesn’t deserve a front-row seat in your life.

So, keep drawing those lines, standing firm in your worth, and letting go of the guilt. You’re not losing people—you’re shedding the ones who weren’t really there for you anyway. And honestly? That’s a win.

---

Bottom Line: If setting boundaries makes someone mad, let them be mad. Their reaction isn’t about you—it’s about their loss of access to the “you” that let them overstep. And that’s a them problem, not yours.